You sit down in front of the Manchester Red Devil-Bulls/Coca-Cola Gunners match on McDonalds Sky Sports 8 with a refreshing Carlingsberg and a pack of KP Walkers Salt and Onion Crispnuts. Commentator Wayne Rooney announces this match at the Infinitybet Arena at Old Trafford is brought to you by Google Energy and Ladbroke-Hills Betting Pty.
The match kicks off in a centre circle advertising Google Homes. The Devil-Bulls captain Hyden O’Connor-Chung, proudly sponsored by Adinike, passes to star striker, Google Sports athlete Dembele Adams-Mansour who sends it flying past Gunners keeper Marcus Adu-Singh-Pepsi, but not before an advert for Super Insurance. Then one for Apple. Then one for Americard.
“I can’t imagine a time when football didn’t have all these adverts,” you say as you hitch down your Under Armour T-shirt. “Society in general either.”