Monthly Archives: June 2016

Sleep- a word doodle

Oh sleep, sleep, wonderful sleep, I try to avoid you for aesthetic reasons. I envision myself as the disordered writer working into the small hours to try and make ends meet. In the day I am tired and often doze straight off.


In my dreams I see the schemes perpetrated by reality. The coverups, the dressing downs, the suspicion everywhere.

What is there to do when I am being lied to?

Escape into the true world.

The dream world.






The First Xotopanian War

The First Xotopanian War took place in 70AC after the League of Rekodenz took over the Diet (then serving only the emerging village of Xotopane) in a bloody coup.

The League was a radical organisation protesting “human occupation” and what they believed to be the genocide of full-blooded Rekodenzians through assimilation. This was despite efforts from both human and Rekodenzian camps to maintain the indigenous culture and to make sure there was no violence between them.

Human, fullblood and halfblood survivors of the Diet massacre led by George Xazaa mobilised those Peacemakers unwilling to fight under the League and battled the League’s Revolutionary Army in what is now (25,000AC) Central City. At this time, it was a small field outside the town borders. However, the fighting spilled out into the town and much of it was destroyed. The League believed themselves to be victorious when they killed Xazaa, but ses second-in-command  Aamare Nelson took over and led the Opposition to a comfortable win.

Despite the Opposition victory and restoration of an open Diet, the League’s legacy remained in several parties purporting to be promoting “indigenous Rekodenzian rights” but instead spreading extremism and bigotry. The most recent and successful of these are the Unification Party, who have managed to acquire the entire Scrublands area through what commentators believe to be fear and threat.


Down the wikihole

This is an experimental piece created by falling down the wikihole, so to speak.

These lifting bags of the AS/CR type are for example used in the contact lenses and medical devices of Trade Unions. Southwest Oklahoma is a geographical face toward New Mexico. Despite the petitions of several billion cubic feet of gas, the recovered helium died on the 4th day of the 4th month in 700.

His parts were recorded by Walter Russell Lambuth’s desire to serve Doshisha Business School. It was established as a seminary for those interested in the priesthood. The regiment lost a total of 263 men during eating feces of other species. As a result of these activities, police began to rely on forged documents to cook and eat them.

In a summary of identification of the extra infertility situations, a genetic evaluation is caused by congential subsections.

And England backs Brexit

It’s a funny old game, isn’t it?

England lose to ICELAND of all people and Woy resigns.

It was coming anyway. What on earth was his insistence on fielding the incompetent Raheem Sterling before the man who almost singlehandedly won Leicester the Premier League, Jamie Vardy about? Is it because Sterling is younger and was tipped as “the next big thing” several years ago? Every single armchair and travelling fan would have put Vardy out there. Might as well hire Fred Bloggs of Dewsbury who got Accrington Stanley into the Prem on Football Manager because the armchair fans know what Hodgson is doing wrong.

Now the only home nation left is Wales. This kind of makes me embarrassed considering that despite some fantastic players they were underdogs for the majority of their existence. England are supposed to be the dominant ones but lose to possibly THE underdog.

A funny old game indeed.

Bags, the Co-op, and why if it isn’t broke don’t fix it

On my unexpected trip out to Cleethorpes yesterday, I saw many people carrying a particular kind of bag. No, not the latest trendy-at-no-cost offering from Primark or even the new Gucci, but bags for life emblazoned with the “new” Co-op logo. I put “new” in quotes because the logo was introduced in 1968 and was revived in the past month as part of a rebranding exercise.

You see, in 2007 the Co-op started going by its full name in order to appeal to a more upscale demographic. They also ditched the iconic cloverleaf, then in its second incarnation, causing an outcry from both the media and the common shopper. “If it’s not broke”, we all said, “why bother fixing it?” This put me in mind of the Lincolnshire branch’s rebrand of around 1998, in which the cloverleaf was dropped for an abstract, very 90s logo with “the Co-operative” written under it. This went down as well as you’d expect, and the clover and common name were reinstated less than two years later.

Not learning from this lesson, the Co-op held fast for almost ten years. Shoppers thought the name change pretentious, the lack of a known branding device discomfiting. Profits dipped and kept on falling until they finally realised it was the marketing that was failing. People wanted a supermarket that was friendly and welcoming, and the generic brand did not give off that impression. So they just went back to the 1968 version of the cloverleaf and their official name to what everyone still called it. The rebrand was extremely well recieved and suddenly the new Co-op bags began springing up everywhere, signs of a renaissance for the beloved British brand.

It has been just over a month since the rebrand was announced, and we are still in a transitional period. Most shops still have the green “Co-operative Food” frontage, with the logo sometimes plastered on (as I saw yesterday evening at the Intake branch) until more permanent signage in the “new” corporate colour of light blue can be brought in. The Co-op story should be taught in all marketing classes to illustrate the pitfalls of changing something people know and love.

As we said back in 2007- if it isn’t broke, don’t fix it!

My surprise trip to Cleethorpes

I was due to attend the Sheffield Show today, but due to a change of itenary in the family my mother and I headed to Cleethorpes for the Armed Forces Day festivities!

Though it was sea and sand, today’s entertainment was close to the sun. We thought the RAF Falcons parachuting demonstration was the highlight until we saw the Red Arrows. Now if you’ve never seen the Red Arrows in person, you don’t know what you are missing. They have a worldwide reputation for a reason. I’ve uploaded some pictures of the Arrows and Falcons to my Instagram, but pictures alone cannot do these justice. It was utterly breathtaking.

Then came the parade, opened by the Mayor of North East Lincolnshire, a royal who I couldn’t see and David Cameron. Yes, David Cameron. Karma is a bitch, isn’t it? It’s really a shame I didn’t get to see him up close and personal. People were waving at him, some most likely waving something.  Before we knew where he was a number of jokes about him being at the concessions after hearing about the pig spitroast were traded. Glad to see the people of Cleethorpes are as Cameronsceptical as yours truly. Onto the parade itself, it only lasted a few minutes and included several major military bands from around the UK as well as servicepeople from around the Commonwealth. I for one particularly enjoyed the Scots pipers- let’s just hope they didn’t get caught in a gust of wind!

Other than that, I got to treat myself to some fish and chips for dinner. I admit to not liking British food (it’s a bit too slimy for my picky tastes), but I will happily munch the quintessential dish. To all of my American readers, I feel sorry for you. You will likely never experience real fish and chips within the borders of the United States. Grimsby fish is considered some of the best in the world and Grimsby is just down the road… do the maths.

And so was my unexpected day at the beach. I also won two quid on a Deal or No Deal slot machine by hedging my bets. Maybe I should have gone for the full five. Or I’ll save that for the big holiday in August.

Cameron votes to leave

So the UK has voted to leave the EU. Both Leave and Remain camps have their advantages and disadvantages, but we will leave them here as it seems like the real motivation for many were the rumours that David Cameron would quit if the country voted Leave. Let’s look at the map:


Source: Wikipedia

Here we see large Leave support in the East and North East, especially in traditional Labour strongholds such as Yorkshire and Greater Manchester. Being from Sheffield I know that Cameron is about as well-liked here as a fart in a crowded sweaty lift, and no doubt he is elsewhere in northern Labour land.